Second Chances

I always think of things to write when I'm laying in bed. So, tonight as I laid (lay?) in bed thinking of a new post, I decided to come out to the dark living room and just get it out.

I didn't grow up until I turned 24. Isn't it funny that I know exactly when my brain fully formed and I was making more intelligent decisions? Did I still make stupid choices at 24? Well, yeah. As a matter of fact, I still think back on my 24th year and wonder if there were times I even had a brain in my head and, if I did, why I wasn't using it. I didn't say I wised up entirely - just that I, on the whole, decided to be who I was and started on the path to accepting that...and liking it. If God was happy with me, why should I care what others thought? Maybe it was more like 25...

I won't bore you with the details of my past, but let's just say that I was probably the most emotionally immature yet completely self-conscious person I knew. Nothing about me felt right so I lapped up any acceptance offered to me, never being fully satisfied but also not wholly unsatisifed as long as the attention was still there. I looked for (and always found) disappointments in people and situations, but instead of facing the disappointments and just dealing with them I would torture myself and the person who I felt had let me down with emotional rants and, well, a bit of melodrama. I filled my youth with dramatic exits, tearful goodbyes, and second, third, fourth and even fifth chances for people who weren't worth my time to begin with. I get exhausted just thinking about some of the silly things I would get worked up about - what a waste of time!

I know everyone can probably look back on times in their youth when they'd love a "do-over". Sometimes I think of certain situations that I know, had I been who I am today, I would have handled very differently. I don't say all of this with regret. By the grace of God I found an amazing man who accepts me completely and drags me back to reality when I'm losing my grip. I serve a merciful God!

Anyway, I was just thinking about the serendipitous ride that led me to this point. How different I was and how sometimes I wish I would have been able to "zoom out" to see the bigger picture. Oh, the stress I put on myself worrying about the actions of others and how that would affect the way they thought of me.

So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:34

It's important to me that I think about these things but not dwell on them. I thank God every day that He was patient with me and gave me the life I have now because of the lessons I've learned. I'm still learning. I pray that I can raise Amelia to not be like me in some ways - always filled with self-doubt and worry. We're all made in His image and that means we are important and valuable - not in an egotistical or self-absorbed way, but in a way that allows us to exude confidence. Confidence in the One who gave us life and continues to bless us.

The LORD is for me; I will not fear; What can man do to me?

Psalm 118:6

Faith in God demands action. Grown-up, responsible action. Action that doesn't rely on whether someone else takes action or what someone thinks of you when you decide to take action. Daily, unwavering, courageous action. The time and energy wasted on creating heartache for others could have been spent glorifying God. These are the lessons it took me 25+ years to learn.

For the sorrow that is according to the will of God produces a repentence without regret, leading to salvation, but the sorrow of the world produces death.
2 Chronicles 7:10

I grew up at 24 (maybe 25!) but I'm still not the person God wants me to be. I work toward it every day, some days falling flat on my face and other days shining bright for Him. As part of God's will and to obey Him I was baptized 15 years ago. November 9, 1994. I have never felt cleaner. Constant, daily action that isn't at all easy but it's necessary. My faith in God demands it.

I wasn't really intending for this to be a Bible study, but how can I avoid talking about God when I talk about second chances and "do-overs"? He's the Master of giving both.

I'll leave you with a couple of cute pictures I took today. I wish I could tell you how much I love this little girl but I can't even come close. How did I get so blessed?


Have a wonderful Thursday!

Another sister!

I'm not feeling very inspired. My camera ate the pictures I took of my chimechangas and chocolate chip cookies on Friday night. They were beautiful photos (in my very biased opinion) but now they're gone.

I have some great news.

No, I'm not pregnant. But guess who is? My baby sister, Lindsay, and her husband Craig! I now have two sisters who are expecting and I am officially the only sister in the family who can eat just about anything I want without gagging (or worse!). Carrie is due April 18th and Lindsay is due May 15th. I'm really excited to find out what they're each having so I can get shopping! Carrie should find out mid-November and Lindsay should find out, yep, a month later in mid-December. The picture to the right was taken while we were in Las Vegas in late August and it's (left to right) Craig, Lindsay, Carrie, and Chris. They're going to have some pretty good-looking babies!

Other than being a little windy, it's a gorgeous day here in Seattle! It didn't start out that way - it was drizzly and gray this morning on my way in to work. I didn't anticipate needing my sunglasses for the drive home! Then again, I have a couple more hours before I leave work, so anything could happen!

I decorated for fall. I thought I had more than just one box of fall decorations but D is telling me that I don't. I just have this feeling. Anyway, it's probably just as well. With the way time is moving these days, I'll have to take them down and put up holiday decorations before I know it!

No immediate plans to make anything crazy for dinner soon. We have a visiting preacher this week preaching on "The Emotions of a Christian" and it's every night at 7pm, Sunday through Thursday. That keeps us pretty busy so it's easy meals for us. The chimechangas I made on Friday got a really great review from David. He told me he would request them for his birthday! So, I'll definitely be making them again and when I do I'll be sure to take pictures and post the recipe.

Until Vintage Thingies Thursday...

Camping, camping...

My man on his motorcycle

Here's the responses I mostly got when I sent out the Outlook reminder to people at work that I would be taking a half day tomorrow to go camping:

"Camping? Outside? Try to have fun."
"Brave soul...camping in late September!!"

It will be cold. I think the low for Friday night dips into the 40s but we're only going for one night so I think we can survive! No rain is forecasted so that's a wonderful thing! Every summer for longer than I've known D he's been planning the annual camping trip for him and usually around 12-14 of his closest friends. As we get older, finding a date that works well for all of us gets more and more difficult which is why a late September date was decided on instead of a mid-summer date. I'm really looking forward to it - we always have a really nice time. Let me share with you a moment from last year's trip...

D and I go to our tent to go to bed. We've forgotten to bring the air mattress so we get into our sleeping bags on the ground. We have brought our little pup, Tess, with us and she isn't content to stay on her blankets in the corner of the tent so I call her to come sleep by me. She's nice and warm and even though it's mid-August, it's cold at night and it feels good to snuggle up to a heater like Tess. All of a sudden she gets really warm. I throw the sleeping bag off of us and she has, in fact, peed in my sleeping bag and it's finding its way onto my shirt. D and I opened both of our sleeping bags, turned mine pee-side-down and slept in his. Even though I changed my shirt it was still one of those feelings like you just feel dirty the entire rest of the trip. I smelled pee for the rest of the night - mainly because Tess's belly was coated in the stuff. Yuck. I seriously want to gag when I think about that.

We are leaving Tess with a nice family while we're gone.

D managed to accidentally stab himself in the upper lip with his pocket knife last night. Poor guy...the tip actually went all the way through his lip. We tried to put liquid Band-Aid on it last night but it wouldn't stop the slow bleeding. So after he took a shower I applied some Neosporin and put a round BandAid on the wound. This morning after he showered he tried the liquid BandAid again and it seemed to work - it looked so much better. I almost took a picture of it last night for blogging purposes and then I thought better of it. I'd like to keep my readers.

It's not that I haven't been cooking or baking. I have. As a matter of fact, a couple of nights ago I made a really yummy chili and some peanut butter oatmeal no-bakes. I also made a chocolate sheet cake for one of D's coworkers who was having a birthday. It's just that those are things that seem pretty simple and ho-hum... anyone can make those things so why post about them? Since we're going camping tomorrow, I probably won't be cooking anything until Saturday at the earliest. Tonight I might throw together something having to do with chicken but trust me when I say it won't be anything fancy. I've got Mt. Laundry to take care of as well as digging all the camping stuff out of the garage and trying to find warm clothes. Okay, so maybe D will be doing all of the digging and I'll be using laundry as an excuse to sit on the couch and watch "The Office" and "Grey's Anatomy". Hey - the laundry has to be folded.

I've been doing pretty well with my daily Bible reading, although I missed on Tuesday so I read two days worth last night. D had a "Daily Bible Reading" Bible that I've been reading out of, but I'm not really sure about the NIV. I'm really enjoying reading the Bible in chronological order, though!

I know a Christian couple who decided to tell their marriage story online. They went through very tough times when she had an affair but with God's help they worked it out and are now making it their life's mission to help other Christian couples who are dealing with the pain of infidelity in marriage. Their work is amazing - they counsel couples free of charge and do everything they can to save marriages. Please visit their blog and if you know of couples who are having a hard time because of infidelity, refer them to Derek and Lisa. If you like what you see on their blog and you feel you'd like to support what they do, they could use any monetary means you can give to further their work. It's such a blessing to have a Christian couple to open their hearts and open their lives to benefit the marriages of others! (click on the picture)

Right now they're giving away tickets to see "Fireproof"! If you haven't seen the trailer for this movie, click on the picture to the right of my blog. You really must check it out!

I will post camping pictures when we get back. Hopefully I'll have a recipe or two to share as well.

I was able to embed this movie but I could not get it to stop Auto-Playing. Since I'm not a fan of blogs where music automatically starts up, I decided to share the link with you so you can listen/look at this at your convenience. This is a beautiful movie - take a couple of minutes and I promise your day will get better :) (click on the picture)

I hope you have a great weekend! I'm feeling in the fall mood so I think when we get back from camping on Saturday I'll put some maple scones in the oven, a fire in the fireplace, and put up my fall decorations. I'm usually just the kind of nerd who will post pictures of my entire living room with fall decorations up, so stay tuned.